Wartime Reflections: Let’s Face it…Chicks Dig a Fighting Man

by | 5 Oct, 2017 | 8 comments

Feminists, progressives, multi-culturalists, limp-wristed masculine apologists—read no further, unless you’re looking for a reason to be angry. If you are, by all means continue for despite current cultural norms, I am led to declare a fundamental truth I’ve come to know.

Chicks dig the warrior.

You know it. I know it. Maybe you’re afraid to admit it.

If you’re a man, at some level, you want to be a fighting man. Perhaps years ago, you fancied closing with and destroying the enemy, but you’ve chosen another path. Blood never stains your well-manicured hands, but there’s a part of you that wishes it did. A savage part of you deep within longs to have your mettle tested on the fields of battle…and to see the women swoon.

Women, you know it too. Maybe you oppose culturally imposed gender norms. You detest gender stereotypes and think boys playing with dolls is as legitimate as females serving in the infantry. Any hint of patriarchy infuriates you but deep down, you love a fighting man. You can’t help it, it’s in your nature. Now, I’m not stipulating a bodice-ripping romance novel cover type scenario…but I’m not ruling it out either.

You want to swoon. I know you do! Go ahead.

A Warrior for a Reason.

I had meant to list the reasons a man might bear arms, but instead of speaking on behalf of all men, I’ll speak for myself. The reasons I fight:

            – Primary reason—I was in the Army when the war started. Not sexy, I know.

            – I drank the Kool-aid and bought into larger themes, originally the defense of ‘Murica, but later themes of good versus evil and the need for strong and courageous men to confront that evil.

            – I find closing with and destroying the enemy intensely satisfying.

            – For my buddies to my left and right.

            – To protect my women, my daughters and wife, from the wicked aspirations of evil men.

            – For my wife. She digs a fighting man.

There’s something overtly masculine about engaging in battle, conquering an obstacle, bending an enemy force to your will. It’s no coincidence that armed conflict provides a perfect outlet for young men, many of whom view the application of violence as a perfectly legitimate alternative in some situations. As such, it becomes a matter of harnessing said instincts and focusing them rightly.

I grew up playing football and I distinctly remember relishing in getting kitted up for ‘battle’. Marching to the field of friendly strife, surrounded by my brothers, preparing for battle with the enemy—I became a warrior and few things satisfied more than vanquishing a foe on the gridiron.

But did the cheerleaders notice? Coincidence that I married a cheerleader?

Fast forward 25 years and it’s much the same. I was privileged to be part of a small combat team responsible for rapidly responding to bad guys on the move. We’d get the word and everyone would sprint to the aircraft, gear up in an instant, and pile into the helos. As quickly as possible, we’d bring the aircraft online while the ground force locked and loaded, did final checks. Within minutes, we’d taxi as a group across the ramp, a convoy of imminent death and destruction, armed to the teeth, ready to descend from the bright desert sky onto the unsuspecting heads of whatever unfortunate bad guy had fallen into our purview. Other warriors stood and watched with respect as we taxied by. Did some kneel in reverence? My heart might just beat right out of my chest.

If only Ami could’ve seen, I’m sure she would’ve been impressed!

Maybe Conan answered it best:

            “Conan! What is best in life?”

            “To crush your enemies—see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentations of the women.”

If you’ve never heard of Conan, do push-ups.

Yes, chicks dig the warrior. I’ll make no concession or caveat.

Warriors All.

Okay, I’ll make a caveat.

Warfare demands courage and strength but courage and strength is not necessarily confined to the battlefield. Warriors prowl this planet in many different forms fighting on many different fronts. My friend refers to them as “fire-breathers.”

Chicks dig a fire-breather.

I read of a man with a sick son, a truly sick son. He battles a lifelong illness and in addition to the litany of medications, frequent hospital visits, and other treatments, he requires a very specialized diet. This diet is ultra-strict and inconsistent with standard American cuisine. This father has taken upon himself to be the primary food preparer. He spends countless hours each week preparing special meals for his son, freeing his wife from the task.


I know of still another man who walked away from his promising career while still in his prime. His wife had been diagnosed with cancer and he walked away without looking back to dedicate himself to be her full-time caregiver. For two years as she wasted away, he was there by her side, all the way to the grave. “I was able to love and honor and cherish.”


I know of another man who stood by his wife for years as she drifted in and out of affliction, as she betrayed him time after time. This man refused to relent and over time, his love won out. They remain happily married to this day, having conquered the demons of affliction.


Chicks dig a fire-breather. They want a man who will sacrifice for them, sure on the physical battlefield, but really on the battlefield of life. They want a man who will fight, whatever the battle, who will fight and sacrifice for those he loves.  The physical battlefield demands strength and courage but these fights often demand a far greater measure. Yes, you’ll die for your wife, but will you live for her?

And don’t think that working those ridiculous hours meets the criteria. Work hard, but that’s not what she wants. Who are you really working for anyway?

The Greatest Battle.

I remain resolutely convinced that the greatest desire in a woman’s heart is for her husband to lead, spiritually. Women desire a man engaged in the greatest battle, the battle for the souls of men.

Unfortunately, the overwhelming majority of men sit on the sideline of this battle. Men have abandoned the church in droves, abdicating their role as the spiritual leader of the home, leaving it up to their wives to hold it together, to train their children in the ways of Christ. Many women make a valiant effort, all while pining away at the lack of their husband’s spiritual engagement.

Scripture is clear in assigning the role of spiritual leader of the home to the man. Scripture calls the man to lead well, to love his wife as Christ loved the church, to lead and teach her spiritually, to wash her in the water of the word of God. (Ephesians 5) Scripture calls the man to teach his children the ways of the Lord, to discipline them, and to disciple them.

I’m sorry if you didn’t want this role. God assigned it just the same. It just is. Most of the godlessness in our society is directly attributable to men shrinking from this battle. Maybe you’ve been tested in warfare. Maybe you’ve fought another battle courageously. Are your engaged in this one, the most important one? Why not? What is holding you back?

It’s not just that she desires this. She needs it. Desperately. She is desperate for your spiritual engagement and leadership. Though this should not be your prime reason, if it’s a reason, engage and see if I’m not right. I’m sure you’ll eventually come to the same conclusions as I did.

Chicks dig a warrior, a fighter, a fire-breather. Who is the woman in your life? Would you be that man for her?


  1. Glenn Bowman

    Couldn’t agree more Bradford. Your wife is lucky to have you and vice versa for sure. This will be a short comment. Your comments in the near will be outlawed as hate speech. I think that is coming soon. So will my remarks. I believe Satan has attacked the family unit by the feminist movement and it’s working. Hellywood makes movies of women physically battling men and winning (Wonder Woman). How far from reality is that? I’m totally against females in combat. It’s an attempt to spread the lie that men and women are the same in every way. That’s a lie straight from the bowels of Hell. This is gender equality PC run amok. What if the women are captured by the enemy in combat? How about being captured by ISIS? God ordained hierarchy of leadership in a marriage and the man is the head of the wife; not because he is superior, but because the woman was conned and deceived by the serpent. It’s a curse actually as is pain childbirth for being deceived. The Scriptures are clear on this. Neither is a woman to preach. It is strictly forbidden (1Ti 2:11 Let a woman learn in quietness with all subjection. 1Ti 2:12 “But I permit not a woman to teach, nor to have dominion over a man, but to be in quietness. 1Ti 2:13 For Adam was first formed, then Eve; 1Ti 2:14 and Adam was not beguiled, but the woman being beguiled hath fallen into transgression”). It sickens me to see women Pastors and you can decipher right away it’s a woman that defies God’s Word. Finally, an observation I’ve seen repeated over & over on a practical and even non-Christian marriage. If a wife controls her husband, she will leave him. My advice to women who have difficulty accepting subjection to their husband. Marry a man you want to led by.

  2. Drew

    Great thoughts, Brad. I pray that saved men will read this and stand as Christian warriors, kitted up with the armor of God, ready to do battle for the things that really matter.

  3. Rick

    Great word brother. I concur.

  4. John Daffin

    You Sir, are a rock star. Those people that have never lived the life of a warrior, whether it be on the field of battle or at home will never understand. I am proud to call you my Brother in Christ and my Brother Warrior. God Bless you.

  5. Paul Walker

    Well said Brother. I am passing this on to my warrior son. Along with his work as a combat infantry sgt, he buries our heroes.

  6. D. Davis

    The worldly embracing of violence and the weapons of war is a sad, perennial aberration among Christians. In times of spiritual declension its ascendency is such that it even achieves a level of false orthodoxy, and in some circles even adulation. But let us be clear, the spirit of war rises from the darkest regions of hell and is whispered in the ears of men by a demonic seductress. Violence of any kind belongs to the old Adam and to those who have long allowed evil to overcome good. But the kingdom of God, the Pax Christi, will have none of it. We who are being sanctified, individually and corporately by the Spirit speaking in the Word of God, must without excuse make every effort to obey the spirit, word, and example of Christ and that early diaspora of saints who made not a flag but the cross their symbol. We must have Christ and not nationalistic sentiments or self-preservation reigning in our hearts. Obedience in this matter is not only possible and desideratum it is absolutely requisite. The final and unambiguous revelation of God in Jesus Christ will not have us even remotely complicit in the killing of other humans. For low, evil, and degraded though we are, humankind is the crown of creation and is held sacrosanct in the eyes of the great creator and redeemer of the world. While it is a fact that these important truths of life and doctrine are suppressed and dulled in the seared conscience of many today they were once so established and universally held that one of the most famous of the 3rd century Church fathers could matter-of-factly write:

    “We Christians no longer take up the sword against nation, nor do we learn to make war any more, having become children of peace for the sake of Jesus our leader.”

    O blessed Jesus, holy, harmless, and undefiled, come this day and cleanse our hearts. Father, wash the blood from our hands with the blood of your Son. Spirit of God, make us alive who have become dead to your Word.

    • • • • • • • • • •

    Having so many times failed in the matter of keeping a nonviolent pilgrimage, let us once and for all trust wisdom and piety far above our own.

    “Live by the sword, die by the sword”
    — a proverb of Aeschylus, 458 BCE.

    “Put away your sword, for all who draw the sword will die by the sword.”
    — the Lord Jesus Christ.

    Neither human wisdom nor divine authority are on the side of violence and warrior worship.

    “Christ in disarming Peter, disarmed [unbelted] every soldier.”
    —Tertullian, celebrated Church father, circa A.D. 160-225, referring to John 18:11, On Idolatry, chapter 19: Concerning Military Service.

    “Long have I held that war is an enormous crime; long have I regarded all battles as but murder on a large scale.”
    —Charles Haddon Spurgeon, the prince of preachers and Baptist extraordinaire, 1857

    “We who were filled with war and mutual slaughter and every wickedness have each of us in all the world changed our weapons of war…swords into plows and spears into agricultural implements…We who formerly murdered one another now not only do not make war upon our enemies, but that we may not lie or deceive those who examine us, we gladly die confessing Christ.”
    —Justin Martyr, apologist, Church father, martyred under Marcus Aurelius in A.D. 165. Dialogue 109 & 1 Apol. xxxix, 3.

    “The soldiers of Christ require neither arms nor spears of iron. Under threats I did not resist. Sorrow, tears, groans and prayers, these are the weapons with which I met those soldiers…I cannot and may not resist in any other way…The servants of God do not rely for their protection on material defenses but on the divine Providence.”
    —St. Ambrose, bishop of Milan, a leading doctor of the Church. d. 397.

    • • • • • • • • • •

    James, the leader of the very first Christian congregation, asserts, “If you really keep the royal law found in Scripture, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself,’ you are doing right.”

    in Christ who is our peace,
    kdd, 2018

    • Bradford Smith

      Sir, did you not realize that killing and fighting was not the pint of the article. It was for godly men to stand up and lead their families as God intends. I stand by this conclusion though it is certainly possible that I communicated it poorly.

  7. Glenn Bowman

    Jesus was not a pacifist nor was he against all violence. Words from our Lord. Luk 22:36 Then he told them, “But now whoever has a wallet must take it along, and his traveling bag, too. And the one who has no sword must sell his coat and buy one”.
    In the OT: Ecc_3:8 “A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace”. Sometimes, war is necessary and has God total blessings.


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Bradford Smith

Bradford Smith

Author - Founder

Soldier, Pastor, Author – Bradford stays busy, with his wife Ami, raising their 9 children, serving the nation, pastoring, preaching, and writing books (#3 is due out October ’17).


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